How To Regain Trust In A Relationship

The importance of trust in a relationship cannot be under-estimated as it can make or break a relationship. In a relationship where couples leaving together and having no complete trust for each other, the relationship is bound to be broken.

Partners who do no longer trust each other tend to remember their partner’s negative deeds often even if they later repent of it. To show you the importance of trust in a relationship, here is what the assistant professor of psychology at Redeemer University College, Laura B. Luchies said, “If you talk to people who really trust their partner now, they forget some of the negative things their partner did in the past. If they don’t trust their partner much, they remember their partner doing negative things that the partner never actually did.”

So you see how great the importance of trust is in a relationship.

But what we most likely see today in virtually every relationship is that people are no longer confident and having trust in their partner. Why is this so?

On the other side, some people see the huge trust they’ve acquired from their spouse and want to use that opportunity- to them- to misbehave. This is very wrong. Don’t take the trust you have for someone for granted. It can cause long time disaster in the relationship.

Recently, I got news of a man and a woman who have known for close to ten years. The two families know each other very well. Though, they were not married. From what I observed, the woman so much love and care for the man, she trusted the man so deeply. But guess what happened. It got to the hearing of the woman that the man had another woman who is having a baby for him.

Out of love and concern for the man, the woman still accepted and forgave him. Later on, the trust completely diminished when the man ran away with the woman’s savings.

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Now! What becomes of that relationship?

What am I trying to say here? You are happy that your partner completely trusts you and so you want to take advantage of that and start cheating on them. It’s wrong. Remember that when you are caught cheating; to regain that trust you once had from the person would be very difficult.

Now the question is for you to answer. Would you want to destroy the trust you suffered to build?

As long as we exist, wrong-doings will remain especially in our relationships. We can’t escape that.

But the big truth is that you can still have your partner trust you even after you’ve deeply wronged them.

Building trust in a relationship is like someone building a house. You start from the smallest. For you to gain trust from your partner, be truthful and trustworthy even in minor issues that seems they don’t really count. If you are expecting they trust you in bigger issues, learn to first invest your trust in smaller issues.  

Do you recall the Parable of the Talents as was told by Jesus in the bible? The servant that was given five talents worked with it and got additional five talents. And what was the master’s remark? “Well done good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a little, I will set you over much …”(Matthew 25:21 RSV)

Do you note the words ‘LITTLE’ and ‘MUCH’? am sure you do.

If you are trust-worthy in little things, your partner won’t be scared of trusting you even in many things.

You can also build your trust by securing the confidence that your partner has for you. Take for example, your partner trusted you and confided a strong and delicate secret that ought to remain a secret between you two and you probably went ahead revealing your partner’s secret to people outside. If you think of building your trust on that basis, then be rest assured that in no time the trust will collapse because of the wrong foundation.

Learn to keep the secrets of your partner and they will be more confident revealing anything to you.

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Lastly don’t hide anything from your partner. Sharing your pains, worries and even secrets is a sure way of building trust from them. Remember that before someone shares a secret with you, you must have done the same to them.

Having a trust whose foundation is strong is what every person ought to strive for. Though it might not be an easy task but for the sake of growing a relationship that other partner would envy at, you must work it out.

There are times you will hurt your partner but don’t forget to use the word ‘am sorry’

Even as you apply all these and more, I see you having a trust from your partner that cannot be questioned.

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